A Final First

When Nec and I were very brand new parents, we probably behaved like most first timers. Okay, yeah, we were convinced our progeny was the brightest, most beautiful, wonderful child ever conceived in humankind. We meticulously chronicled every small detail of every minor milestone and major achievement Thing 1 could manage. And, in some ways, we were justified. Thing 1 was a quick study, even as a newborn and achieved the usual baby milestones much more quickly that most in his peer group.

By the time Thing 1 was 15 months, however, we discovered there would soon be a Thing 2, and priorities shifted. We still reveled in the minutiae of Thing 1’s seemingly miraculous abilities, but our attention was now divided. Whereas before we had only 1 small, perfect being to focus on, we now had to start over and record each detail of the newest member of our family.

As most parents of multiple children close in age will tell you, at times, your survival mode it to keep your head down and take each day as it comes. Somewhere in our total brilliance, we thought it was a good idea to have 2 children less than 2 years apart. 2 babies in diapers. Yes, I was obviously suffering from a strange and inventive form of parental senility.

At any rate, we did record, and I can remember, most of the biggest, important milestones in Thing 2’s infanthood. I also know that while he could sit up, crawl and walk more quickly that most, he didn’t cut his first tooth until he was almost 17 months old, almost a full year past the time the majority of babies will cut a first tooth.

The Things continued to get older, as children will do, and I noticed a disturbing trend of diminishing milestones. These had altered and changed over time, to where it’s not based on physical and motor development, but more on societal achievements, such as a first day of school or a first sleepover. The physical measures became less and less frequent, and more difficult to define. It’s tricky to see how quickly a child grows from day to day or week to week. Every once in a while, however, there are some exceptionally stellar moments that remind a parent of the joy and wonder that is raising a child.

Last month, Thing 2 finally lost his first tooth. He’s now 8, and will turn 9 in a couple of months. Developmentally, he is years behind most of his peer group. Most children lose their first tooth towards the end of year 5 or during year 6. This is, unless they manage to knock out their front teeth by diving into playground landscaping when they’re 3. But, that’s a story of a different Thing altogether.

Thing 2 lost his first tooth, and while I was genuinely excited and happy for him, I was starkly reminded that my children are quickly growing up, becoming their own person, and leaving their father and I behind in the dust.

I don’t think I’d have it any other way.

Are You Lonesome Tonight?

I'm a terrible blogger.

Or, perhaps I should say I'm not a very faithful blogger.

There's plenty going on in the McD house that might qualify as blog fodder, but I've either not had access to a computer (thanks, Things), or I've been too exhausted to put together two thoughts to prepare a blog entry. But, once again, I'm going to attempt to be a more faithful and creative thinker.

Maybe.

At any rate, tonight was the big Trick-or-Treat pilgrimage. Personally, Trick-or-Treating falls into the realm of parental responsibilities and less into the fun catagory. I feel more a member of the Donner Party and have less Halloween spirit than the rest of the McD house. It's the costuming. The Things don't allow me much in the way of creativity anymore. I think next year, I am going to insist on something more interesting than the latest movie character.

Now, I'm off to work on some of the ferocious knitting I have to complete before December 25. I always promise myself that I'll start the gift knitting early, but as Mary Poppins says, it's a pie crust promise.

And, I have somewhere in the neighborhood of 250 pictures to download from the camera.

I suppose it's a good thing I get an extra hour tonight. I'm going to need it.

The Parental HALO Is Slipping

It appears Necropolis and I aren't going to be in line for any parental awards anytime soon.

Over the past weekend, Nec rediscovered an interest in his Playstation 2 and has the machine set up on the TV. I don't usually bother with the thing and have little or no interest in what happens. The Things have a couple of games for it, but have seemed to prefer the computer. Until now.

This weekend, the boys, the grown one and Things, have been playing HALO 2. In short, it's a sci-fi, shoot-em-up type game. It has a multitude of player options, but generally the boys have been either playing against each other (find your opponent and shoot them) or as a team against the game.

Yes, I know there are a lot of people who would take exception to letting a 7- and 9-year-old play a game of this nature. It may really seem as if we're not being very discriminating parents here. And, I might agree with you, except there's a method to our madness. We never just 'let' The Things win.

Somewhere along the line, we decided that good sportsmanship and developing real creative thinking skills were more important than the current pervasive parenting idea of letting kids win to improve their self-esteem. And, we don't play Candyland or Operation around here. The Thing's first 'real' game was Perfection. It was quickly followed by Trouble and Sorry, both of which were quickly grasped. We still play these as a family, but more advanced games became required. We brought out Chess and Pente. So, MUC has never won a chess match, poor kid. Pente is usually a best of 5 tournament, as that's all either kid can take before they blow. I'm eagerly awaiting for them to grow up a bit, so I can drag out my very old and very well used Scrabble. It'll be a while.

When The Things got decks of UNO cards for their last birthday, I showed them how to play with one hand, and after that, it was all or nothing. I was willing to bow out and 'assist' each boy, but MUC insisted on continuing play until he finally beat me. It took 7 times (and about a hour and a half of continuous play), but he finally did it on his own. That one win was more important to him than any of the previous 6 losses. Now, I'm as likely to lose as to win to either Thing. The Things are well on their way to becoming sharp, critical, analytical thinkers. And, there's ain't nothing wrong with their self-esteem either.

As to HALO, as they navigate the worlds, they have to remember where they are, where they've been and where they're going. They have to complete missions, make decisions and think critically. Then, they get to shoot and blow things up.

I can live with that. If that makes my parenting dubious, I can live with that too.